Stupid Christmas, Stupid Sam
by SYuuri
Summary: Jules has been having a terrible week and has lost some of her Christmas spirit. But everything may not as bad as she thought. xX oneshot Xx S/J


**Stupid Christmas, Stupid Sam**

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**Disclaimer: Anything you recognize isn't mine.**

**:: So, Tirsh, CTI_Jenn and Molly Lyn decided to write each other a Christmas story. And.. *inserts drumroll* I am Mollylyn's Secret Santa! Her prompts that I used were 'worst Christmas ever' and 'Christmas sweater', although the later only has a small role in the story. I hope you like it, Molly Lyn! :)**

**:: This is AU, but imagine it to take place in season 5 when Leah has joined the team. Thanks to CTI_Jenn to be my beta.**

* * *

The curtains were still tightly shut but Jules knew that it hadn't stopped snowing yet. If anything, judging from the increasing cold in spite of the heater, she was fairly certain that there would be a fine nice layer of snow waiting for her when she stepped out. Maybe it's a good thing after all that Sam couldn't make it home; she would hate to imagine him driving all the way from Ottawa in this hideous weather. It was one thing to have her jeep dented, but it was an entirely different thing to receive a phone call from St. Simon and hear how Sam had been involved in a nasty incident. _Cool thoughts, Jules, cool thoughts_, she mused as one slim hand reached out of the comforter to knock on the nightstand three times.

She groaned inwardly. He'd better tell her for sure when he was coming back because she would have to shovel the driveway. Or maybe she could put the tool outside and have him shovel the driveway himself. She knew she wasn't being fair. It wasn't even remotely his fault that he had to be away during Christmas. If she wanted to get angry at anybody, it would be at the military for choosing this time of the year of all time to hold a military training. She didn't think it would make a very charming impression on the General, though. She wasn't even the slightest bit sure Sam's infamous father had had anything to do with the training.

Ten days ago Sam had joined her in the locker room, waiting until Leah had checked out before he barged in. His somber expression had stuck to his face the entire time he inform her that SRU had decided to send him to Ottawa to attend an anti-terrorist training the military was holding for a week starting on the 16th. Given his military background, Sam, of course, was undeniably a logical choice, but it didn't mean they had to welcome the news with joy. It was possible to make it back just in time for Christmas, but somehow the General had caught wind of the news and called Sam to tell him that he might as well stay at the base for Christmas since he would already be there. He wasn't asking, and it was definitely not something Sam could weasel his way out of, especially when his mother took over the phone from his father and explained how they understood if he couldn't. Jules knew Sam always had a soft spot for his mom.

That's why she wasn't expecting him to return for at least three more days. So what if she had had plans for the two of them this Christmas? She was not a big movie buff, but she could get by watching Christmas movies marathon, courtesy of Spike and his massive DVD collection. However, every heartfelt movie would only reserve to remind her how she was spending her most favorite holiday alone. Though, with her condition right now she wasn't sure if she could still live up to her plans, even if Sam were home.

If her head was being more agreeable with her she would shovel the driveway later in the afternoon. The sight of the snow piling up, or even just the knowledge that it was there, would drive her bonkers.

Fighting off the throbbing headache hammering her head, Jules rolled slightly in bed to catch a glimpse of the digital alarm clock on the nightstand. It was almost nine but she still felt so tired. Yesterday, Ed had given the team an early Christmas present in the form of his do-it-or-die drill. Normally, it wouldn't have bothered her so much. Quite the contrary, she enjoyed the training Spike called torture. Today, however, a monster headache had woken her up even before the sun peeked over the horizon. Her bones were aching all over and she could feel her dinner right on the back of her throat.

_Stupid Christmas. Stupid Sam. _

Her fingers tightened around her pillow, her toes curled in Sam's oversized socks as her gaze never left the clock. Uncharacteristic tears blurred her vision. For the past few days she barely even spent time downstairs more than necessary. Looking at the half-decorated, Christmas tree-less living room only upset her even more.

She wouldn't spend Christmas day alone. The team always had an annual Christmas dinner in one of their homes, this year in the Lane's resident. Ed had been bragging about his new grill all week. She was grateful that she had had her turn last year because she didn't think she had the so called Christmas spirit in her to decorate the house and prepare the food for dinner. Just the thought of it already made her queasy.

Their work schedule had been pretty hectic for the past few weeks -frankly, she had been waiting for someone dressed up as Santa to show up demanding that they give him back his precious reindeers or he would do something life threatening- and there hadn't been enough time to fully dedicate her heart and soul to beautify her house. Once Sam had left she still tried to be her usual jolly self and continue to 'have fun' with the Christmas decorating. After all, before Sam and she reconciled, there'ed been nobody but her enjoying the Christmas festivity in her house. So this time shouldn't be that much different, right?

However, even the sight of a garland made her want to strangle someone with it. Every colorful, earthy, warm decoration was a constant reminder of how lonely _and_ pathetic she felt for feeling lonely, and she finally did the only thing she vowed she'd never do: she quit.

_Stupid, stupid Christmas._

The alarm finally beeped, signaling three minutes had passed. She willed herself to crawl out of bed, ignoring the churning in her stomach.

* * *

Sam took a sip of his coffee, enjoying how the hot liquid slid down his parched throat and warm him. The snow had made the usual 5 hour drive even longer, and there was a roadblock just three miles away from home because a sedan had slipped and hit another car before ending up in the ditch. Thankfully, nobody was seriously injured. He would have grabbed a taxi if only the car wasn't stuck in the middle of a heavy jam. The last thing he wanted was for Jules' car to get towed after the roadblock was lifted for blocking the street.

He had slipped out to the nearby Timmy's while the cops were conducting their investigation and cleaning up the street. It had been a pretty straight-forward case -the snowy road had caused the car to slip and thus wreck another car while the driver was trying to regain control of his vehicle- so by the time he had finished his second coffee, the road was opened for traffic once again. He made a quick trip back to Timmy's with the jeep, and got them both a double-double.

A grin slowly formed on his face at the thought of his girlfriend. Having worked the holiday last year, this time it was Team One's turn to earn the Christmas week off. Unless something major happened they didn't have to report to work before next Monday. Knowing Jules though, she was probably already awake since seven this morning, especially when he wasn't around to persuade her to spend the morning lazying around in bed. He was imagining her having breakfast or putting finishing touches on the decoration around the house. Everybody said that home was where your heart was, and Sam had never really realized how true that statement was before he moved in with Jules. It also kind of fit too, seeing how Jules was the heart of the team.

He was almost giddy when her house was finally on sight. However, as he drove closer, a frown replaced his smile. Something was definitely missing, and it wasn't difficult to pin point when the neighboring houses were practically bathed and covered in various Christmas decorations. The lights were off, of course, but the topiary animals and nativity set on Miss Christie's yard hadn't been there when he left last week. The McKnight's across the street had even put up some mini Christmas trees to line their walkway.

Jules' driveway was inaccessible due to amount of snow that had built up overnight, so he pulled over on the curb. There's a wreath with a bright red bow and silver bells on the door, and that's all. Worry started to gnaw at his heart even more, he turned off the engine, grabbed Jules' double-double and climbed out of the car.

When he pushed the door open, he was greeted by silence. The birds were merrily chirping outside -they certainly were in a better mood than Jules seemed to be- and he could hear the McKnight's kids' happy laughter and shrieks, but the silence inside the house was nearly deafening.

Was Jules even home? Maybe she decided to spend the night in… where? As far as he was concerned she didn't have a close friend she'd rather stay with than in her own house - her sanctuary. She could be babysitting for the Wordsworth, but from past experiences Wordy would bring his girls to their house instead of the other way around. That, and she would have told him yesterday when he called her. She had sounded a bit off last night and when he asked her about it she told him she had a migraine. He didn't completely believe her, but he knew better than to voice that aloud.

Sam had purposely didn't tell her that he was coming home sooner than planned because he had wanted to surprise her. He'd felt terrible that he'd had to leave, but a job was a job and someone had to do it. It's not like the military people and cops from other agencies were happy they had to be away from their loved ones during Christmas. It was a small sacrifice compared to the big picture.

His surprise was complete when he saw the living room was practically bare. Sure, there were braids of garlands on the staircase and Jules had put up a large wreath on the mantelpiece to temporarily replace the painting residing there all year long, right with two socks with their names sewn in golden threads, but the whole thing was still far from close to Jules' Christmas decoration standard.

And where was the tree?

* * *

Jules sat limply on the floor of the bathroom, head leaning against the side of the tub. She was very happy, beyond happy, if possible. It was totally unplanned, but she was thrilled. She knew Sam would be too. They had been talking about having a family of their own for a while now. It was kind of amazing how they had gone from having a secret locker room relationship to exchanging honeymoon conversation and now, they're really facing the reality of being parents. Both Sam and she didn't exactly have plenty of heartwarming family stories to share growing up, so she was confident that their child would be okay. They would make sure their child received the support and love they unconditionally deserved.

If this wasn't one hell of a Christmas present, Jules didn't know what would be. _Hey, Braddock, I got you an autographed jersey of your favorite team, and oh yes, we're also having a baby! Which one do you like best? _

Her chuckles quickly morphed into quiet sobs before the dam broke, the palm of her hand pressing against her eyes. When her period didn't arrive last month, she didn't think much about it. When December came and again, her period never did, the bell inside her head started to ring. She never told Sam about her suspicions because it really could be one of those things that happened. A woman's body was a mysterious wonder, after all. Then she woke up two days ago with a severe nausea, and that was the clincher. She stopped by the pharmacy on her way home from work to get a pregnancy test. A test she had continued to put off until this morning.

As clingy as this made her sound, she needed Sam. She _wanted_ him.

Now that the cards had finally been turned over, there were several issues they would have to address. Her involvement with the team was one thing. Some adjustment definitely had to be made, and she wasn't looking forward to having Sam hovering around like a father-hen around the clock. Still-

The sudden rise of bile in her throat nearly gagged her and she swiftly pushed herself off the tub, barely making it to the toilet. Was this really how every morning was going to go from now on? She thought as her dinner from last night purged its way out of her system. Sweat bubbled on her forehead, sticking her hair to her skin in matted clumps. The whiff of wind blowing against her soaked nightshirt made her shudder involuntarily but she didn't really pay attention to it until he said her name.

"Jules?"

She froze; her hand was still around the handle after she flushed her dinner down the drain. _No, no, no! _

Sam, as expected, rushed to her side and knelt next to her, his hand warm on her back. He sounded panic-stricken, close to hysterical. She supposed she wasn't exactly a sight for sore eyes. She was lucky if she looked only half as horrible as she felt. "Jules, you're okay?"

She closed her eyes tightly, blinking back tears of -what? Frustration? Sadness? Happiness? Despite what she just said a few minutes ago, she did not want to have him here. What was he doing there anyway?

"Jules?"

Eyes opened, she thumped a fist against his broad chest. Needless to say, Sam looked confused as hell. "What the hell are you doing here? You're- you're supposed to be at the base, listening to some random dude with a buzz cut sprouting lectures about terrorists and bombs and-"

"Jules-"

She knew she was rambling and barely making any sense, but at this point she hardly knew what was and wasn't anymore. Later, she would solely blame the hormones. "This was not how you're supposed to find out - me, looking awful and worshipping the porcelain God like my life depended on it. It's supposed to be a beautiful thing, Sam. I would have told you in much much better ways. Anything but this. But no, you're here and you- why are you even here?"

The bland accusation in her voice cut him. He couldn't take his eyes off of her pale face as he was trying to digest the strings of incoherent words she all but yelled at him. Her eyes were bloodshot and even though she did just throw up half of her body weight just now, he had a strong feeling she had been crying. One thousand and one scenarios jumbled through his head but nothing seemed to make sense. He opened his mouth and closed it again the next second, not really knowing what to say as to not to make her more upset than she already was. His grip on her shoulders slackened and she yanked free of his grasp to reach for something behind him.

Jules struggled to get to her feet, swaying a little at the sudden change of momentum and grabbed his shoulders, pushing him up. She pushed him backward to the door and before she slammed it right in front of her face, shoved something into his chest.

"Just get out, Sam, I can't deal with this right now. Get out." He heard the lock turn.

Still trying to wrap his mind around what had just happened, Sam held up the 'something' she had shoved to him to inspect it closer. Could that be the reason why she was so upset?

For the first few seconds he only stared at the long white stick in a daze. It seemed like he knew what that was, but at the same time the concept was too out of nowhere and foreign to him that he wasn't sure if he was holding what he thought he was. Then the circuits finally connected and his heart stopped. Time stopped. Everything stopped.

Just the fact that he was holding a pregnancy test was enough to blow his mind, but not only that, the test was _positive_.

Jules was pregnant. With his baby. He's having a baby. They're having a baby!

Still flabbergasted at the new, life-changing information, he took a seat on the edge of the bed, feeling like his legs were failing him. He couldn't tear his eyes off of the pink positive sign. He was just relieved it's not the one stripe-two stripes variety because he didn't think Jules would appreciate him asking her about which meant what.

A baby…

He laughed out loud- the laugh sounded more like a strangled squeak than a real laugh. A baby!

_"Sam, get out!" _

Sam immediately clamped his mouth shut, biting into his knuckles to prevent another burst of euphoric laughter. Tried as had as he might though, it wasn't possible for him to kick off the silly grin from his face. He mulled over his options. He wanted to get to Jules, making sure she was alright and that she was as happy as he was at the news, but at the same time he understood her need to have some time alone right now. He had heard some crazy stories from Ed about Sophie when she was pregnant with Izzy, but he had chalked it off as his team leader's exaggeration. Guess now he had his own crazy stories to tell.

Standing up, he walked to the bathroom and leaned his forehead against the hard surface of the door. "Sweetheart, I'll be right downstairs, okay?"

A faint sniffle muffled by the door, but no real answers.

Sighing, Sam waited for another five minutes before he could peel himself away. He left the bedroom door open, hoping he would be able to hear her from downstairs if she called for him.

He took a seat in the recliner in the living room, a million of thoughts racing through his mind. One stood out from the rest: he was going to be a father. There would be a little person who would depend on him and Jules until he or she was big enough to take care of themselves. Even then, he reckoned, their baby would always be that - their baby. Seconds turned to minutes. He was content.

His eyes gave the living room a once over. Did Jules find the news so discouraging that she lost all the drive to decorate the house? But no, it was pretty obvious that she only found out and was just as surprised as he was, which could explain why she was so mad that she didn't get to tell him in a more… sophisticated way. Not that he cared about that. He was going to be a dad and that's the only thing mattered. They were going to be parents.

Mind made up, he got up and pulled back all of the curtains. With the sun's rays filtering through the windows, the house looked almost close to how it always looked before - less gloomy. The only thing needed to complete the transformation was Jules' smile and laughter. He opened the windows in the kitchen to let the air circulate better and returned to the living room where he proceeded to arrange the sofa and the coffee table just a little bit. Satisfied with how everything looked, he headed down to the basement. While waiting for Jules, he might as well make himself useful.

It wasn't hard to locate what he was looking for- Jules labeled every single box in the basement. He piled up the ornament box on top of the larger box with the pieces of the artificial Christmas tree as to not to crush the ornaments and flung the red and green tree skirt over his shoulder. As he was carrying the boxes upstairs, Sam wondered how Jules dragged it out of the basement when they weren't together. The stuff wasn't exactly light, though he supposed Sarge weighed more than the tree box.

Sam had cleared up his path beforehand so he didn't knock anything down. Accidents averted, he put the boxes by the mantelpiece before spreading the tree skirt in the corner in front of the window. It took him a while but he finally figured out what went where and in no time he was practically glowing with a sense of accomplishment at the neatly assembled Christmas tree that had at least a foot and a half on him. When he was younger his mother never let the Braddock kids to go near the neatly decorated Christmas tree and when he moved into his own place, he didn't really care that much about Christmas to have one. He would save the decorating for later after Jules came down, but he could do other things meanwhile.

He went to the kitchen and rummaged through the lower cabinet. He found what he was looking for with ease -Jules was just one of the most tidy people he had ever met- and took two Royal Pine car freshener back to the living room. Growing up, it was one of the Braddock's rules to get a real tree every year. It was a pain in the ass, but even Sam couldn't deny that the real deal smelled very good. Maybe next year he could convince Jules to get a real tree, though chances were she would tell him to go ahead as long as he's willing to clean the needles for the next two weeks. Feeling satisfied with himself, he hung the car-fresheners on two different spots and inhaled deeply. For now, these would have to do.

While admiring his work, his eyes caught one of the tree decorations peeking from ornament box and he grinned, suddenly feeling more inspired. On the table, Jules' double-double had gone cold. He didn't think drinking too much coffee was recommended for pregnant women anyway.

Pregnant.

He broke into all smiles again.

* * *

After almost one hour, her stomach finally settled down some. The cold, hard tiles had started to feel uncomfortable and she pushed herself up. She shed her now soaked clothes and put them into the hamper before stepping into the shower. It was a quick hot shower, but it did the trick. She felt significantly better and more like a person than a babbling mess. She wrapped her body in a big fluffy towel and brushed her teeth, gargling Listerine afterward to eliminate the last bitter taste in her mouth. When she returned to the bedroom, Sam wasn't there.

Her hand sought out her stomach. She couldn't deny that she had been pretty mean toward Sam. But it had been such a stressful, long week, and the pregnancy and his sudden appearance on top of everything had toppled her completely off guard. Jules flushed as she remembered her endless ramble and outburst, right after she dropped a bombshell on his head nonetheless. She didn't even give him the chance to explain. She must have scared him shitless.

Jules dropped the towel to the carpeted floor and quickly pulled on the Christmas sweater Sam's mom had sent them the year before and slipped into a pair of sweats. Sweats that wouldn't fit her anymore in a few months. She pulled her hair into a messy bun and studied her reflection in the mirror. She was less pale as before and her cheeks had a rosy tint to it. Now all she needed was for Sam to wrap himself around her while she slept for the next two days to get rid of the purple bag underneath her eyes.

A sound from downstairs grabbed her attention and she breathed a sigh of relief. Sam didn't leave. He said he wouldn't and there he was. He stayed.

There were so many things she wanted to say to him she wasn't sure where to start. Probably with an apology before she went on and on about how she was so happy that they were going to have a baby, and she hoped he was to. That the pregnancy was unplanned, but they would never call it an accident baby because they had created something so beautiful out of love. When she reached the landing, she caught the sight of the tree in the living room and all speech evaporated into thin air. It was enough to make her eyes moist again. Damn hormones!

"Feeling better?" Sam asked from the kitchen.

"Yeah, Sam, I'm truly sorry, I was-" She paused mid-sentence. Bowls and trays and mixers and all kind of baking equipment were laid out on the counter. She wouldn't exactly say a mini storm had taken place in her kitchen while she was upstairs, but it seemed like so. She would make him clean up later, but she couldn't lie that this was the first time in a long week that her house felt like home. "What are you doing?" Now that she had gained her composure back, the question was asked in a much softer tone than before.

Sam grinned sheepishly and lifted his hand, showing her the gingerbread man cutter. "I heard ginger cookies were good for morning sickness, and since it's Christmas I figured why not make some gingerbread man cookies?"

Jules held back a sob and she quickly dashed to where Sam was standing. He even had on her lavender apron, for Pete's sake! Sam, on his part, looked a bit wary, probably wondered whether she was going to give him another tongue lashing or punch him for making a mess out of her kitchen.

It was neither.

She practically flung herself at him, her arms slinking around his neck and holding on tightly. "I'm so sorry."

He tossed the cutter to the counter and returned the gesture, one hand slipped underneath her sweater to caress the skin found there. "That's okay, Jules. I understand."

"But you did nothing wrong and I lashed out on you, it's just wrong." She insisted.

At the reminder as to _why_ she lashed out, his grinned grew wider. He kissed the nape of her neck, burying his nose there and enjoying her freshly floral scent. "We're pregnant."

Jules laughed against his shoulder and tightened her hold around him. "We are. Well, at least according to those pregnancy tests we are. Should go to the doctor to confirm it."

Sam pulled back half an arm length to look at her. "Those?"

"Four different brands of pregnancy tests."

He pecked her nose. "Sounds good enough to me,"

"So, you're okay with this? I mean, I know we talked about this before but we never thought it would come so soon."

Sam cupped her face in his hands, waiting until she looked at him. "Sweetheart, I just found out that you were pregnant an hour ago but I already love the baby like I do you. More than anything."

He could say the sweetest things sometimes, and the ironic part was he didn't even realize it. He just did it because it was what he felt. She kissed his chin, loving the prickly stubble tickling her lips. "Me too."

"Good."

Jules gave his shirt a persistent tug. "Seriously though, Sam. What are you doing here? Not that I'm complaining, but aren't you supposed to be 300 miles away?"

"You're sure you're not complaining?" Sam asked with a playful wiggle of his eyebrows that earned him a light smack on the arm. "Well, we wrapped up yesterday and my dad called in the evening, informing me they had to fly out to Ft. Bragg in midnight for a meeting with some General from a third world country. We managed to meet up for dinner before they left though. Mom's new sweater for you is in the car."

Jules kissed him. It seemed like things weren't as bad as she had originally dreaded. "We're never going to run out of jumpers, aren't we?" She gestured at the one she was currently wearing. It was maroon in color with small, white snowflakes around the chest area. "At least your mom always keeps it classy."

He caressed her still flat stomach, his expression was a mixture of wonder and concern. "You're okay? Still queasy?"

"Not really, I can definitely eat some of those cookies you're about to bake." Her eyes wandered to the living room. "I saw you had put up the tree."

"I know tomorrow is Christmas Eve already, but we can start decorating tonight." Sam tucked a stray hair behind her ears. "Has the morning sickness been going on all week? Was that why you hadn't started to decorate? Because you were too beat?"

Jules shook her head. "It's like cooking for one. Not so much fun."

Sam kissed her forehead and released her to put the tray inside the oven. "Not that you don't look so adorable in that apron, but I had no idea you baked. Did they teach you that in special forces?"

He tweaked her nose. "Very funny. When we were kids, came Christmas mom always asked Nat and I to join her in the kitchen. The gingerbread man was Nat's favorite before she got old enough and would tell you how many calories a cookie has. I seemed to recall seeing a gingerbread man cutter once when you're cleaning up the cabinets, so." He untied the apron and put it on the counter before taking her hand in his, guiding her to where the Christmas tree was waiting.

"Car freshener. Creative, Braddock." She commented, amused, fingers grazing the artificial needles.

"Is that okay? If it's too much and the scent makes you nauseous we can take them off."

Jules raised on her tippy toes and pressed her lips to his in a warm, loving kiss. He was quick to respond, wrapping his arms around her waist and hauling her flush against him.

"It's perfect," she muttered against his lips. "Merry Christmas, Sam."

"Merry Christmas, Jules," he replied and grinned, blue eyes fixated on her stomach. "Merry Christmas to you too, Baby Braddock."

* * *

**Merry Christmas! Let me know what you think on your way out? :)**


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